college changes you

Every student who is approaching their college career has heard people say, "college changes you." If you are anything like me, you had no problem saying that you were never going to change. When you're just so sure of yourself, why in the world would you ever allow something like college to change you? Looking back, I was wrong. And if you're saying that now, you're wrong too. You will change. I'm a walking example of the fact that college DOES change even the stubborn-est of individuals.

A couple of days ago, I was freezing my ass off walking around campus in my boyfriend's oversized Brazil quarter-zip. I had leftover curls in my hair and the entire sidewalk I was on was practically deserted. It's times like those when I allow my mind to wander. Sometimes that's bad, but I felt like this time it made sense. I began to play through my life before college and compare it to the first semester of college that I am (almost) done enduring. It was odd.

Before college, I cared. A lot. About myself, about others, about things that didn't need to be cared for. Even though I enjoyed to be lazily dressed and didn't always dress to the nines, I cared about my appearance quite a bit. I cared about what other people thought about me. I cared that my grades were nothing but perfection, and anything less than an A was not satisfactory in my book. I payed a lot of attention to others. I looked at how they were dressed (bad, I know), how they looked (even worse, sorry), and their personalities. I wanted everyone to like me. I needed the approval of everyone around me. In other words, I spent the first 18 years of my life working SO hard to impress and gain approval of people that would vanish from my life in a matter of months.

Now, as the first semester of my college career comes to a close, I'm a totally different Olivia. I feel foreign in my own world, but it's not such a bad thing. I've realized that sometimes it takes (what seems like) your whole world crashing down around you to realize your fatal flaws. Now, I don't care so much about what I wear. I'm a college kid, so I do wear norts/leggings and a t-shirt everyday, but even when I wear "normal clothing" it's comfy and not uber-expensive. I've become familiar with sale racks, thrift shops, and the saying "I don't have the money for that". And, that's okay. I'm okay with that. It's making me appreciate the things I DO have that so many others don't. I've come to realize that having a few good friends is worth more than having everyone in the world love you. I've lost a few friends in messy ways recently, but I couldn't be happier with the amazing individuals I have in my life. They bring me up constantly and keep me laughing. Although grades don't mean everything to me anymore (maybe this is a new flaw?), I'm still determined to keep them where they need to be. Oh, and most importantly, I've learned to follow my heart. That's my favorite lesson of all.

To wrap this up, here is a beautiful picture of my favorite building on UT's campus, Ayres.

Thank you, UT, for making me a different person. It's okay to let college change you.
xoxo, Liv